We have all played with them!! What about the serial bandits the ones who are 'not playing much' but who always seem to come in with a cracking score in the competitions.

We also need to find the scapegoat for our poor performance in our Saturday fourball!!

Let us know them - we will out them!


Paul is the 'Sombrero' man for his banana shot on the 17th at Lansdown.

Myself, 'Jammy' John, 'Dynamite' Dave, 'Anxious' Alan and 'Pan Pan' were playing in our usual Saturday fourball. It had been a fairly uneventful round until the 17th hole which has out of bounds into the race course on the right. On the boundary is a telegraph pole  - the wires to which Paul has been known to hit in the past. Not on this occasion though. The rest of us had driven off when Paul addresses his ball, concentrates and then lets fly........ the ball looked as though it was going to end up in the  grandstand on the race course. However, it arched off to the right in an amazing parabolic display which defied all law of flight!! The ball curved majestically around the right side of the telegraph pole and then turned sharp left before landing in the middle of the fairway in a perfect position for the next shot to the green. We were speechless until Paul said ' a nice little draw there' !!



'El Bandito' this week is 'Jammy ' John.

He had been complaining for weeks about how difficult it was giving shots away to everyone!! He proclaimed that he only needed to enter another medal to push his handicap up by one!! The previous week he had played in 4  matchplay competitions and had lost all of them!! The June Wednesday medal seemed a good enough opportunity to 'even the scores out'!!   'Jammy' lived up to his name alright. A double bogey and a couple of  bogies were intermixed with 5 birdies!!! Definitely  sombrero material.  On top of this his playing partners were 'delighted ' by the fact that on 3  occasions putts which looked to be steaming 8 feet past the hole hit the back of the cup jumped several inches into the air and plopped  considerately into the hole. A net 68  results in this award. 


The black mask of the bandit goes to 'Dynamite' Dave this week. In our Saturday fourball he had a stomping round playing well below his handicap. Long straight drives were followed by pinpoint irons. Even when he got into trouble - as on the 15th when he landed in a fairway bunker - he still managed excellent recovery shots which more often than not resulted in a gross par. He even parred the Index 1 hole!! Consequently he played to a handicap well below his official one. He was dead chuffed!!


Alan's Achievement against Pirate Paul.

John and Dave were unable to play on the day before Christmas, they were busy - a likely story!!  Anyway Alan and Paul against all odds made it to the course. What a surprise lots of others were there as well, so they decided to play the back nine. Alan started with a par then a double bogey followed by a bogey - playing well under his twenty-eight handicap. Paul was three down.

On the thirteenth Alan hit a poor drive and  Paul hit into the rough just in front of the tee - a poor shot. True to form though  he took a five iron and with his Popeye arms smashed the ball some 150 yards down the fairway and went on to halve the hole having to give a shot. The thirteenth is where John got his nickname ‘Jammy’ John. Paul won the fourteenth.

Which brings us to the fifteenth were Paul hit his drive into the field on the right, Alan hit one down the middle, Paul took a second ball and smashed it like a demented soul. Alan asked where Paul's ball was and Paul said by the mole hills. Well whose ball is that? On closer inspection it was found to be Paul's first ball - it had hit something in the field and bounced back onto the fairway -  a true Christmas present from above!!

Alan won 2 and 1 but Paul parred the eighteenth - a stroke index 4 hole. 



 Paul & John were lined up in a fourball better ball medal  with  Alan & Angus. It was their 1st competition of the year. Thankfully the weather was favourable. There was a wind, but for Lansdown , on the top of the Cotswold escarpment, it was but a breeze! Apart from that it was dry and the course was in excellent shape despite a deluge of rain the previous day.

On this occasion there was no need to call out the emergency services or to rely on outrageously lucky shots. This was a round to remember, a round which would confirm their status as "Bandidos" - all they need now are matching mexican moustaches.

John birdied the first three holes and from there on there was no looking back. The deadly duo dovetailed in and out of the scoring. The round was played in a relaxed atmosphere and with humour which was in no small part helped by the AA team who also played very well.

However, the round will be remebered for the fact that between them P & J came in at a 10 under par net 61!! At the same time it is not an exaggeration to say that it could easily have been 58. It was a memorable round and unreservedly qualified them for "Bandits of the Week".

They also won the competition!!

10.08.06    Double Whammy!!

Myself, 'The Squire' & Alan G were playing in the Captain's Charity Day. This followed a successful charity outing in Gloucester a month earlier when we had come in third and won luxurious hampers of wine and food. We were quietly confident of providing another surprise!!

We started well. With 2 to score on each hole and prizes for nearest the pin on each hole we were doing well after 3 holes. Super Bandit Alan birdied the third and we were looking good. Even with a low score on the 6th with only myself  scoring we were doing OK. Alan proceded to birdie the next hole   and  then we came to the 8th. This is a difficult par 3 and is made more problematic with the wind. My tee shot ended in the bunker so it was up to the other two. 'The Squire' confidently teed up and swung his club with intent. The ball flew off towards the green but then suddenly turned sharp left,  it missed the bunker and cannoned  heavily into the stone wall on the left of the fairway. In an instant it had ricocheted off the wall at a favourable angle shot towards the green  and landed very kindly just on the edge. I looked in amazement before laughing. " Good course management" he said nonchalantly!!

When Alan G had regained his composure his tee shot ended in the bunker on the right of the green. We needed to score on this hole to stand a chance of getting amongst the prizes for the front 9. 'The Squire' managed to get down in 2 more but Big Al produced a wonder shot. His lie in the bunker was not good but he managed to make perfect contact. The ball shot out of the sand, clipped the rim of the bunker, checked and  moved right, away from the flag. On pitching on the green it spun left , hit the flag and went in for another birdie!! I again looked in astonishment  while he calmly said "that was just what I intended."

We completed the front 9 with the hope of better things to come on the back 9.     How the  mighty fell!!!


On a cold crisp morning  John, Paul and Alan were joined by Adrian for this round. Dave was otherwise engaged on this occasion. Alan & Paul  were playing John & Adrian. At last the greens were back in play and were looking good. The first hole was relatively uneventful and fairly forgettable. On the second the tee shot required a draw or a straight strike left of the gaping bunkers. Anything right was in trouble in the rough or the trees. Adrian struck a screamer into the middle of the fairway; Paul pulled slightly left but well in play. Advantage them! John struck fully with his new driver and the ball soared sweetly away - right in to the bunker! Alan stepped up following good strikes on the first hole. He confidently teed up and swung smoothly through. Smack- a good, clean connection and the ball flew away. It was heading right,  directly towards the conifers standing guard near the bunkers -  oh no we thought when suddenly - thwack - the ball struck a hefty sapling in the newly planted copse in front of the conifers, took a sharp turn left and ended up on the fairway. It was a shot right out of the 'Jammy' John rescue repetoire. It proved to be the shot of the day. Well done Alan!

April 2009      -     Definitely Dodgy Dave

On a bright warm early summer evening on the appropriately dated 1st April Dodgy Dave was elevated to the definitive status of BANDIT. Having come from a background of experience of bandit country and claiming an unlikely handicap of 24 we had expected as much from this newcomer to our group.

Andy was away on a penance trip to Thailand, Alan was wilting at work under a tonne of bannanas so it was left to Paul, John and Dave to maintain our commitment to this frustratingly addictive game.We teed off rather later than anticipated due to John's tardiness and his discovery that his driver was broken. Anyway off we went and Dave proceded to par the first 3 holes to take what proved to be an unassailable lead for our 9 holes.

The 4th hole is a short 267 yard par 4 which requires an accurate shot down the narrow fairway, which has out of bounds on the left and trouble on the right.Usually an iron from the tee leaves a wedge to the green. On this occasion Dave took his driver and with his by now characteristic short back swing thumped the ball on a beautiful arc towards the green.It was a great shot but we could not see where it finished. Paul took his trusty iron and ended in the ideal position. John, who was trying out a new driver, unusually took this club and fired a straight shot towards the green but again could not see where it finished.

On approaching the green we were able to see that Paul was in prime position, John was 30 yards from the green but Dave was ON THE GREEN about 20 feet from the flag. I had never seen this in my 20 years at the club. I had been told that single figure players achieve this but had never played with anyone or seen anyone do this before let alone a 24 handicapper!!

He was definitely a Dodgy Dave from now on. Incidentally he did not make his eagle but did secure a birdie!!

 March 2011 - Another Dave........ !!!!!

'Dealer' Dave - what can you say about him? I just don't have the time! It is just enough to copy this part of the Lansdown Golf Club March 2011 Newsletter.

The Seddon Bowl

Sunday 20th March 2011

The Seddon Bowl, a trophy which was donated a few years ago in memory of Mike Seddon, is for all new adult members who joined the Club during the previous year. This year's winner was Dave Madge with an excellent score of 43 points. Runner up was David Pike with 41 points and in third place was Alan Griffiths with 39 points. All the competitors enjoyed the day with fine weather and the course in super condition as the scoring suggests.







































































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